Down with "success-speak"

Much of the coaching I do involves helping people to learn skills and techniques to help them improve as public speakers but sometimes it happens that unlearning things shows itself to be more of a challenge than learning them. Let me explain.

There are a vast array of products and services available to people who wish to improve their public speaking ability and many of them are very good - I offer a heartfelt thanks to all those people who provide them. Much of what is available, however, is limited, misguided or flat-out bad. The main complaint I have to lodge is that these products and services create a style of presentation that while, efficient and practical, is ultimately empty and inhuman; a kind of "success-speak". This style of speaking lies somewhere between a radio dj and the stereotype of a used-car salesperson. These people know how to engage a crowd, how to put their points across and are frequently successful in business as a result. The question you might well ask is, "if it works, why do you have a problem with it?"

Alright, let's cut right to the chase. I do not coach people to help them earn more money, I coach them to give them a better understanding of what factors define the way they put together ideas and express them and then help them to take control of those factors and become better communicators. If they choose to use this power of expression to earn more money, which they certainly can, that's fine, if not, that's fine too. There are many other avenues they could explore relating to their creative aspirations and personal life as well. In fact, it may just be that by becoming a better communicator you will finally have the ability to express the fact that you truly hate the life that you live with your high paying job.

Going back to my original point of "unlearning"; I find it is often far more difficult to get people to drop the robotic "success-speak" habits than to teach them new information. A good rule to remember for most situations is to make sure that your speaking style is not that different from the way you would speak privately to good friends, not in content, but in tone and sincerity. We have enough technology to master in our lives without turning ourselves into robots so down with "success-speak" and up with the expressive person you really are.

www.laughlearnlead.com

http://twitter.com/chrismolineux

When does "competent" become an insult?

Thanks for the feedback on my series on the fear of public speaking, I have just completed the first volume an audio series "Ending your fear of public speaking" which will be for sale on my site and on itunes soon. This last weekend I did a keynote and two workshops for the Toastmasters district 21 conference in Whistler B.C. and I have been asked to train the Coca Cola team that will accompany the Olympic torch in 2010, so life is busy.I will continue with my series on eliminating the fear of public speaking shortly but would like to do something a little more interactive right now and hear some of your opinions.

  Practicing a speech is often a good idea but it is difficult to enjoy a speech that sounds practiced. This is also true with different strategies and techniques that are used within a speech. I sometimes see people deliver speeches that are very tight and well packaged and follow a lot of the book advice that is out there but far from being impressed, I'm actually put off. I would rather see someone fumble through their content, but in a very genuine way. 

So at what point is it that compentence becomes a liability and all those skill sets and methods hold you down instead of building you up? I'd like to know your opinions and hear your stories on the subject. 

Thanks! Chris

                                                                www.laughlearnlead.com

                                                           http://twitter.com/chrismolineux

                                                                  

  

End your fear of public speaking – part 1

I had quite a bit of interest in my blogpost "The imaginary fear of public speaking" where I addressed the subject in a general way.I would now like to start a series that covers some practical solutions to this all too common concern.

 

One of the greatest fears that people have regarding speaking in public is forgetting what they are going to say. To be standing up in front of a group of people and not having a clue what the next word, the next sentence, the next idea, is supposed to be. Just standing there silent and frozen …… nobody wants that. The standard method people have to deal with this is to write their script and then try desperately to remember it word for word. This process is often a real trial and made all the more difficult by not considering certain aspects of the way that the speech has been put together. There a few simple strategies that will help you produce a speech that is easier to remember and truer to your own personality and views.

 

There are two sources of knowledge that you can draw on to ensure that you are never lost in the middle of a speech: knowledge of the material and knowledge of the script.

While I can’t teach you how to improve the knowledge of your material I can point out that understanding the nature of your knowledge of the material will help you with the process of writing and delivery. The first step of this process is all about defining your connection with the material. Some people are fortunate enough to speak about subjects that feel truly passionate about, but not all of us are that lucky. Quite often we find ourselves speaking about dry subjects that we are sick of hearing about ourselves. To a certain degree it’s unavoidable, but you can make the best of a bad situation.

 

Start of by clearly defining the exact information that must be put across and the exact message(s) that this information is intended to convey. Strip it down to the essentials and if you are still information heavy, consider transferring some of the details to powerpoint or printed material that your audience has at their table. Once this is done you should then think about the connection(s) that you have with the material at hand.

 

a)      Is there an underlying idea or concept behind the information that you can point out, sum up or even attach a catchphrase to? If so, write it down and then harness that potential in your speech. Repetition of main points and the use of monikers and catch-phrases make material more memorable to both you and your audience.

 

b)      Are there aspects of it that you feel more strongly about? Even the driest subjects usually involve some emotional content, even if it is just feeling passionate about an idea or technology involved. Some people communicate very well by drawing on their emotional attachments to a subject, if you feel you are one of those people then summarize your emotional attachment to the material and bear it in mind while you are writing your presentation.

 

 

c)       Have you had experiences that relate to the ideas and subjects at hand? If so, consider using them. People have a natural tendency to organize a speech with a purely logical framework: get the information/ideas – explain them logically to the audience. The problem with this is, that not all people communicate most effectively in a logical framework. Some people relate things well through experience which can involve telling stories, or referring to characters. When relating stories, make sure to be careful to stay very close to the point you are trying to make – is it relevant or is it gone – but consider the use of stories/experiences. Think about whether you like relate to things through stories when talking to friends, if you do, then consider how to use this in your presentations. Define your strengths and work with them.

 

These is just a rough outline of a few beginning steps – I will be back with more on the blog soon, and I am always more than happy to work with individuals or groups in greater detail – stay in touch and …. thanks!

                 www.laughlearnlead.com

                 http://twitter.com/chrismolineux

How comedy can change your life ...... episode 3

I ended the last blogpost by mentioning that I provide the participants in the workshop with a series of questions and get them to present the answers so I can find out more about them and observe how they assemble and communicate their ideas. I typically ask about 8 questions which are taken from a wide selection that I am always adding to. The questions are not of a skill testing nature; there are no wrong answers and there is little preparation required.

 

 Some of the questions ask for direct information about the person:

 

 “What nicknames have you had and what is the story behind them”

 

Some of the questions are more abstracted:

 

“What inanimate object would you most like to be”

 

Some of the questions are designed to elicit attitudes and opinions:

 

“What’s the most frustrating thing about the modern world”

 

 

The answers are to be presented rather than simply read out. While no-one is expected to turn the presentation into a full-blown comedy extravaganza there should be a little verve put into it, all depending, of course, on the personality of the person who is answering the questions. In some cases the raw information given with each answer is of value, and sometimes the method of construction and/or the style of delivery is more important. While there is too much involved this process to give a complete summary of it here, I will use the three cited questions to help give you some idea of what can be involved.

 

“What nicknames have you had and what is the story behind them”

 

The answers given to this question sometimes relate only to simple rhyming words but more frequently they will give information about the person’s personality and/or interests, how other people perceive them, and their reactions to that perception. Nicknames can sometimes be indicative of another side of someone’s personality and background, and having a group share nicknames, not only brings them greater understanding and familiarity, but it often has an amusing side as well.

 

“What inanimate object would you most like to be”

 

This is a much more psychologically driven question. Some of the most typical answer categories are:

1 - the kinaesthetic: a bean-bag chair, a pillow

 

2 - the logical: a satellite, a television (“so people want to see me and I can be entertaining and different all the time”)

3 – the sexual: a bra, Mel Gibsons saddle

4 – the poetic: a rock, a tree

 

This is a very short list of possible types of responses and the answers to this question are unavoidably revealing of a person’s character and the nature of their value systems. This is directly relevant to the way they construct ideas and speech. Someone who is very logical will relate very differently to a subject than someone who is very poetic and/or kinaesthetic etc. etc..

 

“What’s the most frustrating thing about the modern world”

 

This is a question that revolves around emotion and it gives people a chance to show how they express emotion. Some people are frustrated about ideological things, others are frustrated by very specific things. Some people will relate to actual events, some will be very impassioned and others very logical and, ironically, almost devoid of what one would call “frustration”. Emotional content can be a defining and powerful aspect in communication skills and comedy in particular. Attitude and emotion can create comedy with very little script and knowing how people deliver emotional content gives a clearer picture of what type of comedy someone may be suited to writing and presenting.

 

 

 

There are many other questions which intended to shine a light in many directions. After seeing the answers to a series of questions delivered I can determine what type of constructions and deliveries people are most inclined towards. Some should write construct things logically – idea based comedy full of observations and examples. Some should relate things through experiences and characters. Some should use emotion, some should use abstraction and often people will have a blend of many things.

 

Aside from what is gleaned from the content, there is also the more basic analysis of the way each person moves, uses facial expressions, how they use their voice, noticing if they relate to things through story and/or character, how they make and use eye contact and much more. The factors that make up each persons communication style and technique are numerous, but they can be isolated and identified which helps to show people the tools and traits they are working with. Reading and assessing these characteristics and potentials is, quite honestly, one of the great joys I have in my work. Students can be aware of some of the things that are pointed out but there are always things that are new and surprising to them and seeing people light up from recognizing and understanding these aspects of themselves is both fun and rewarding for myself and the other students.

 

Once this analysis is completed I can guide students as to how to write and present comedy in a way that will suit them and, thus, be more real and effective in front of a crowd. It is fairly self evident how the process I have been outlining translates into better communication/public speaking skills and in some ways the main question that may remain in the mind of the reader is “where’s the funny part?”. The reason that you haven’t been reading a lot of funny examples in this blogpost is because the funny is different for each personality and for each group. The focus is on comedy and it comes out consistently as all the other learning takes place but I can’t relate exactly what it is to you because it is different every time. Humour is the most human of activities and this workshop is intended to examine and enhance this human element which for the benefit the individuals as well as the group.

 

Any questions?

www.laughlearnlead.com

http://twitter.com/chrismolineux

How comedy can change your life (part 2)

To those of you who read part 1, welcome back! To those who have not, please do take a look at that as well, but do feel free to read the second part first.

The comedy workshops that I put on are designed to achieve three main objectives in an enjoyable and engaging way:

1 – To fundamentally improve each participants public speaking skills
2 – To strengthen the bonds and mutual understanding of the group
3 – To enable people to identify and enhance their creative potential

I like to work with groups between 4 and 10 people, so I can really focus on everybody individually. I begin by discussing some basics of comic theory which provides some structure to start de-mystifying what comedy is and shows how humour can be used to illuminate or to obscure. Some of this material examines what stand-up comedy is not.

1 – It is not about trying to make people laugh – comedy should be predicated on you, not the crowd. Define your own sense of humour and figure out how to make the most of it.

2 – It is not about trying to find what is funny – usually comedy material is written about things that interest you for whatever reason……and you learn to make them funny. Nothing stifles comedy creativity faster than “looking for stuff that’s funny”

After this I discuss how to take control of the environments people speak in; covering printed materials, taking control of room layouts, stage setups and introductions

(for more on this see my blogpost: “Before you’ve even said a word” http://psworkbench.blogspot.com/2009/03/before-youve-even-said-word.html )

The issues of making the most of lighting and the advantages that can be gained through understanding sound systems are also given consideration.

After this point the workshop takes on a far more interactive dynamic. The participants answer a series of questions that are given out in advance. The answers are given in a presented format rather than just reading them out. This gives me a chance to find out more about the people involved and see how they present themselves. In this section I am able to find out how people move, how they use expressions and body language and how they actually put their ideas together and express them. Each persons’ presentation is reviewed afterwards by myself and by the others in the group, so the insights that are gained are shared amongst all those involved. It’s also important to remember that this workshop revolves around comedy so the mood is always positive, observational and constructive without a harsh critical edge. Having worked as a comedian for so many years means that even the most involved of subjects is granted levity and this makes for a truly fruitful teaching environment.

What are these questions and what types of things can be learned from the presented answers? Well… that my friend, will be part of what will come to be known as “part 3” – stay tuned and thanks ----- please do feel free to post any comments or questions.

   www.laughlearnlead.com

http://twitter.com/chrismolineux

How comedy can change your life - (part 1)

Comedy is a mystified thing. When people find out that I teach stand-up, the standard question posed is: can you really do that? It has been said by some that attempting to disassemble and understand comedy is like doing the same with a frog: you cannot capture it's essence and it dies in the process of trying. If that sentiment was originated by a city dweller than it can safely be called an urban myth. While humour is subjective and each individuals' sense of humour unique, it can most certainly be understood and to a great extent defined. I have decided to write this blog-post in order to make clear some of the benefits of understanding how you create and express comedy and how my comedy workshops can be of great value to your company or group.

I began working as a stand-up comedian in 1986, and have had the good fortune to work with people such as Robin Williams, Jim Carrey and Ellen Degeneres and have performed across Canada, the U.S., the Carribbean and the UK. In 1998 I began teaching stand-up and I realized fairly quickly that I was, essentially, teaching people how to put together their ideas and express them in public so I made the transition to coaching people in public speaking, just purely, the art of public speaking. For years people had suggested that I speak on the subject of "humour in the workplace" but I felt no desire to tell people that if they gave their photocopier a name and wore a Hawaiian shirt every third Thursday they would enjoy their soul-draining job. Let it be said that what I do does not fall under the traditional category of  "humour in the workplace". 

The finest joke that humour plays is that is disguises itself as something unimportant; as a joke. It is a most effective disguise, and aside from a handful of theorists and those in the world who simply revel in being positive about everything there are few who gain from the all the value that humour has to offer. Aside the the positive and much publicized effects of laughter and social bonding there is the reality that comedy is an examination, an investigation, a method of understanding the world. If I choose to write a joke about something I am examining the subject in a uniquely personal way and often that examination can yield interesting results. In Arthur Koestler 's outstanding book "The Act of Creation" he draws parallels between scientific discovery, poetic revelation and comic punchline - all three use an original perspective to come to a "eureka!" moment. This point of view flies in the face of comedy as a "joke" and it presents a wealth of opportunities for those willing to take them.

What I am interested in is the idea of getting people to understand and harness this potential for something powerful and productive in life and/or business if indeed, business can be described as something distinct from life. By watching people live and on video I seperate the strands that make up who they are, comedically and in other ways as well, and help to give them a sense of what specifics can be controlled and used to maximum potential. In a group setting there are added benefits that come from  camaraderie and mutual understanding. In the next blogpost I will go into the structure of the comedy workshops that I offer and how they can fit in with and benefit your own situation. In the meantime I welcome any and all questions on the subject ....... hmmmm?

                                       www.laughlearnlead.com

                                   http://twitter.com/chrismolineux

Before you’ve even said a word

Taking control beforehand to make your presentation easier

 

To some degree all forms of public presentation share a common ground with the stage hypnotist. Before you go to a hypnosis show you see posters to advertise it that evoke a certain mood and mindset, when you arrive at the venue it is more dimly lit than usual, the music is of a calming nature, all diversions are shut down/switched off, and the heat is turned up slightly. Even when the hypnotist speaks he does not charge directly into the hypnosis but, in a low, slow voice, gives a pre-amble speech that helps to further reinforce the state of mind and mood that has already been established in so many ways. By the time the hypnosis actually begins the hypnotist has already put you in a state that makes his job so much easier.

 

In public speaking you can often do the same. Here are a few things to consider that could help make things go more smoothly for you.

 

• If you making an important presentation try to make sure that your audience receives information in advance about you and/or your topic. Sometimes having printed material distributed immediately beforehand is useful as well. Things that can be read are things you might not have to say, and it gives them something to refer to before, during and after.
• In a perfect world, every situation we speak in would be problem free but….. until that perfect world arrives it is best to be aware of all the little things.Take control of your aspects of the room you are presenting in where it is appropriate. Make sure your sound and lighting is the best it can be. Simple things like keeping the lights bright on you and dimming them on the audience can really focus your audience on you. Make sure you can be seen and heard.
• Ensure that the area you are presenting in is completely under control in terms of materials you need, podiums, water, etc. and double check anything that’s plugged in. The last thing you need is to have to play Mcgyver in the middle of a keynote.
• Get a sense of who your crowd is beforehand and see that they are seated to maximum advantage. If you are in a big room that isn’t very full and people are all pressed to the back or scattered around try to get them to gather together near the front. Usually people are happy to co-operate and it can make a world of difference.
• Consider exactly how you are introduced and try to make your introduction work to your benefit. It is also advisable to get the most important person possible to introduce you. At times, the job is pre-set and inflexible, but sometimes you can have a say, and if you can get the president of the company to introduce you it raises your level of importance. Your audience has their eyes on you and wants to know what you have to say….. before you’ve even said a word.

                                                       www.laughlearnlead.com

5 reasons why you shouldn’t speak like Barack Obama

On January 20, 2009 1.8 million people gathered on the US Capitol grounds, the National Mall, and the parade route in Washington D.C. for the inauguration of the 44^th president of the United States, Barack Obama. Nearly 38 million Americans watched inauguration coverage on television, the most popular Inauguration Day on TV since Ronald Reagan took office in 1981 which drew 41.8 million viewers. In describing the event beforehand, the media likely used the word “historic” more times than at any other point in American history since the moon landing in 1969. The centerpiece of the proceedings was the inauguration speech, and this article is written in specific reference to this speech, rather than about the speaking style and technique used by President Obama in a more general sense.

   In the days following the inauguration, there was much discussion about the event and about the speech in particular. One comment I saw that referenced the speech was on a social networking site and was responding to a small business owners question about how to improve his public speaking skills. The comment recommended that the person should watch and learn from President Obama’s speech because that was great public speaking. At first glance, this may sound like good advice, but on closer examination it is of little use to someone who has to address small business groups. President Obama’s speech was made by a specific man, for a specific crowd on a specific occasion and to use that particular speech as a model for all one’s own speeches would lead to both tragic and comic results.

   To make the point at a simple and ridiculous level I could say that just because President Obama wore an overcoat for his speech, doesn’t mean that you should wear one for yours. This (joking aside) would actually be a valid piece of advice. What can be learned from this approach, however, goes far beyond such a trite example and because this particular speech is so well known, it provides a framework to put forward some valuable points to a large number of people. When coaching people in public speaking, it is important to emphasize that, though modeling other people can be effective, one cannot rely on any one style or system. Instead, it is more important to have a thorough understanding of one’s own style and abilities, combined with knowledge of the material in question, the points that need to be made, the nature of the crowd, and the environment they are in. Technically, I suppose, these are illustrations rather than reasons, but the title “Five aspects of the inauguration speech that illustrate why most people shouldn’t speak in the majority of situations the way Barack Obama did in this one speech ” seemed a bit wordy. At this point I shall be examining the specific style and techniques employed by President Obama in his inauguration speech and by doing so I will, hopefully, shine some light on how to make the most of your own speeches.

1 – Don’t stand behind a wall, a bullet-proof barrier and a lectern.

 

    A speech is about far more than just speaking; movement and body language can help to transmit a great deal of mood and information to your audience. While it is not very often that we have to deal with the first two items in question, the third is not uncommon. A lectern is not without its place; they can be most effective in providing a more serious air to a speech and are quite handy for a script or notes but the majority of presentation situations require a more comfortable and communicative face. It is preferable to be seen from head to toe and, of course, to learn how to express yourself effectively through gesture and movement. While there are some basic do’s and don’ts, each person has their own style of movement. Some people can move around and gesture a tremendous amount and look very comfortable, while others would look horribly nervous doing exactly the same thing. Find out what factors define your own style of movement and learn how to use them to their greatest advantage.

2 - Smile at least once every twenty minutes.

 

   Unless you are at an event that demands an extremely subdued mood, there is no reason to turn your speech into the dour hour. In moderation, smiling helps to put people at ease and creates a more positive mood. How broadly and how often you should smile depends on a number of factors but certainly it is important to consider your subject and your crowd and take into account your own appearance. Some people have a naturally happy look and others possess a natural severity. If you have a face that seems to smile all the time, you don’t have to reinforce it by smiling a great deal and, conversely, making a real effort may be very helpful to someone with a more sour countenance. 

 

 

3 – Don’t write a speech with constant historical references.

 

  When you are making a business presentation your audience wants to know what has just happened, what is happening now, and what could happen in the near future. While some background can be useful to provide context, boost morale, or illustrate a point, talking too much about the civil war will just make you look as though you are ignoring what is important. In this regard, also be mindful of the make-up of your audience. As a general rule, the older the crowd, the more they will relate to the referencing of the past and a younger crowd tends to be more interested in hearing about the future.

 

 

4 – Make eye contact with at least one person in the audience.

 

  Eye contact is a powerful thing. While people tend not to like being stared at, they do appreciate, during a speech, an occasional look to give them the feeling that they are being included. To stare outward in the direction of the crowd, but not actually make contact with any one single person will only work against you. Eye contact can also be used in very specific ways during a presentation. If, for example, you have one table or group that is not paying attention, make solid eye contact with one member of the group; consciously or subconsciously this will help to focus all of them. Eye contact should seem natural and not in a pattern or on a schedule and with some people, it can be balanced with a “thoughtful” absence of eye contact which effectively brings people in.

 

5 - Don’t try to stir emotions and then pause for applause too often.

 

   In small weekly boardroom meetings it’s probably best not to do it at all. Taking oneself too seriously is a quick route to looking foolish and structuring a speech that assumes too great an importance to its statements, especially in front of an audience that is either too small or too casual for it to be appropriate will rob you of all credibility. Humility can be a valuable tool, and genuine consideration of opposing viewpoints can help to give clarity to your point and silence the critics who may be present. To stand rigidly with your chin up and your face stern repeatedly making grand pronouncements is something that should be done only with the greatest of care. For some people, dignity and command are fundamental aspects of the character they always present, for the rest of us, much better to work well with the tools with which we have been provided.

 

 

   I hope that you have found some valuable information in this little list and are able to put it to good use when making presentations in the future. Defining and refining your own style and technique in public speaking is an involved endeavour but with continued observations and efforts it can definitely be done … best of luck!    

                                                         www.laughlearnlead.com